I Became Spider-Man's Cousin in Anime Crossover

Chapter 325 The Other 5 Winter Soldier: You're so annoying! [Beep—!!!]

Steve Rogers stood alone at the corner of the messy passageway, his back to Bucky and Riley. His broad shoulders were taut, like a rock bearing a thousand pounds of pressure.

His heart, enhanced by the super-soldier serum, pounded heavily against his chest. Each beat brought a dull ache.

Howard's youthful, spirited face, and the chilling image of Bucky killing Howard and his wife under brainwashing, were like two completely opposite currents colliding and tearing fiercely in his mind.

Fortunately, the steely will forged by the brutal battlefields of World War II ultimately prevented Steve from being completely consumed by the storm of morality and conscience.

That deep-seated sense of responsibility and concern for his brother, whom he had lost and found, pierced through the heavy fog of pain like an inextinguishable lighthouse.

Just minutes later, when the heavy footsteps sounded again, approaching from afar and finally stopping in front of them...

Before Riley could even figure out how to start the conversation, Steve turned back on his own.

The pain he endured did not disappear. It was simply suppressed by something deeper and more resolute, like surging magma forcibly sealed beneath thick layers of rock.

Those deep blue eyes were still bloodshot, but they regained their sharp focus and fell straight on Bucky.

He didn't waste any words; his voice was deep and hoarse, yet carried an undeniable clarity: "And then, Bucky? After that... what happened to you?"

Bucky looked at Steve, at the storm he was trying to suppress and the burning concern in his eyes, and felt a mix of emotions.

He did not evade the issue, nor did he attempt to embellish it; it was as if he had long been prepared to lay bare this heavy past before his dearest friend.

So as soon as Steve finished speaking, Bucky turned his head slightly, his gaze unfocused on the cold metal wall, and his voice returned to its previous almost cold calm, like an observer who was not involved, continuing to tell the story unhurriedly.

"Thanks to Mr. Howard's efforts, the brainwashing effect of Hydra has begun to show a more obvious and irreversible decline. Every minute and every second is constantly wearing it down... In this way, just as the ancient Eastern country said, as long as you persevere, even a thick iron pestle will be ground into a fine embroidery needle. It is only a matter of time before you completely regain your self-awareness."

"But Hydra isn't stupid; they're obviously aware of this flaw."

"So, after each mission, when I was brought back, what awaited me was not rest, but another thorough and procedural brainwashing. It was an attempt to reinforce the worn-out parts and suppress the 'bubbles' that had surfaced."

At this point, Bucky's voice paused noticeably.

His jawline tightened, and the fingers of his metal left hand unconsciously curled up, making a slight metallic scraping sound.

After all, simply describing the process is enough to awaken that painful memory that runs deep in your bones.

The mental torment caused by the repeated, repetitive experience of having one's will forcibly erased, like dealing with a dirty blackboard that needs to be used repeatedly, is far beyond what can be simply described as "brainwashing."

But soon, Bucky took a deep breath, his tone became steady again, and he forced himself to continue speaking.

"However, humans are often far more adaptable than other living beings."

"As the number of brainwashing sessions accumulates, the body... or rather the brain itself, will slowly develop a kind of resistance, much like the immune system that fights diseases."

As he said this, a glint of sarcasm and smugness flashed in Bucky's eyes.

"The more frequently they try to overwrite my consciousness with the program, the more obvious and stubborn this resistance becomes. This forces the intervals between brainwashing sessions to shorten, and the duration of the effect to become shorter and shorter, creating a vicious cycle... That's why they ultimately chose to freeze us—all the Winter Warriors—and only awaken us when 'necessary.' Like... using an expensive and easily worn-out consumable item sparingly."

"During this period, due to Mr. Howard's influence, although I was not able to fully remember who I was, I gradually realized the importance of hiding the existence of 'self-will'."

"I began to understand that resistance alone was not enough to survive and eventually get rid of them."

"I need to proactively cooperate and play the role they want me to be. I need to appear... docile, reliable, efficient, and faithfully execute any orders without any 'extra' thoughts."

"I deliberately mimicked the state of being brainwashed, executing every mission 'perfectly,' and acting like a soulless weapon that only knew how to obey..."

"Over time, Hydra began to feel that the other five Winter Soldier seemed to have some kind of 'personality flaws,' making them more prone to 'instability' during operations and much harder to control than I was."

"As a result, I 'stood out' among the six Winter Warriors and became their most frequently used 'tool'."

"As the number of times I wake up increases, those fragments of memory that never truly disappeared will surge into my mind in large quantities each time I wake up, like bubbles that have been accumulating under the ice for a long time."

As he spoke, Bucky's lips instinctively curled into a self-deprecating smile.

His eyes became somewhat vacant, as if his soul had been detached and returned to that long and dark period.

In the cold cage of Hydra, in the brief moments of freedom between missions, he was like a lonely scavenger, futilely trying to piece together a complete "Bucky Barnes" from those scattered, chaotic, and fleeting fragments.

"Those images are blurry and chaotic... but they always inexplicably make me feel at ease and nostalgic. They allow me to clearly realize the fact that I am still alive."

"So, I could only desperately grasp at them, like playing a jigsaw puzzle, trying to connect them top to bottom and compare them left to right... Relying on these scattered clues, I gradually recalled who I really was."

"As time went by, I gradually recalled the familiar bustling streets of Brooklyn, the deafening cheers from a baseball stadium... a stubborn, short, blond young face... and a face filled with despair, receding into the cold wind on a speeding train..."

As he spoke, Bucky subconsciously turned his head slightly, his gaze seemingly focused on Steve's face, yet also seemingly penetrating him to look into the distant past.

After a brief silence, Bucky's voice rang out again, noticeably hoarse, carrying a deep weariness and an indescribable sense of comfort.

"The process was long and full of uncertainty. Every piece together was accompanied by immense fear... the fear that the next brainwashing would shatter these hard-won fragments once again, and everything would have to start all over again."

"But even if I'm as careful as possible, there will always be times when unexpected things happen..."

"No matter how docile I appeared, Hydra never let its guard down, constantly monitoring my every move... ubiquitous cameras, inescapable tracking devices implanted in my body, and the unwavering process of brainwashing followed by freezing..."

"Not to mention, during this period, if I show even the slightest sign of regaining my memories, or even just the slightest deviation from the behavior logic of the 'perfect weapon'... what awaits me is an even more brutal brainwashing program."

"They will use even more forceful methods to smash the 'Bucky Barnes' that I have just painstakingly pieced together in my mind to shreds again, returning it to a blank sheet of paper waiting to be painted."

At this point, Bucky keenly noticed the increasingly grim expression on Steve's face—a heavy gloom mixed with heartache, anger, and helplessness.

This caused Bucky to pause deliberately.

Then, meeting Steve's eyes, which were filled with complex emotions, he shrugged and spread his hands.

Then, he grinned, revealing a deliberately nonchalant, flippant smile, trying to soothe Steve's emotions in a relaxed manner.

"So, Steve, you don't need to worry about me being too bored these past few years..."

"After all," every time I wake up, I have a whole bunch of 'puzzle pieces' waiting for me to complete.

"Besides, talking about this makes me a little angry..."

"I've endured so much hardship and patience, and in the end, you brat ruined everything, making my plan a complete failure!"